I am in Chapel Hill, which still feels like home. Even though I have not lived here since the summer of 2006, and I did not grow up here, but three hours away. Many of my friends have left, but a few have stayed. It is probably banal to note that it is likely that one prefers the kind of natural environment that one grows up with, but yes, this is true of me.
I miss having lots and lots of trees. I would like to have both lots and lots of trees, a career, and a social life -- ideally. Don't get me wrong -- I'm pretty much a city girl. Camping doesn't appeal to me (along I would go along with it). I'm just into cities with a shit-ton of trees. Southern cities. I don't even know why I love the South so much except for it is my home.
I do not dislike the desert, but I am tired of it. I am tired of living in the Northeast, too. This is ok, because I am going to Buenos Aires, a city I know that I love.
Things to do:
++Self-similarity maps for all the data I've collected
++Then, music correlational data. Please, let me done with analysis!!
++paperwork for fulbright
++website for dinosaur??????? yesh.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Saturday, July 20, 2013
oh yah, and things to do---
++Download Cage/Cunningham version of Variations V (in process!! OF COURSE they have this at UBUWeb, but it took me forever to find the entire thing in downloadable form)
++FINISHED Ballet analysis
++Still need to run
++Do Fulbrightz paperwork stuff...
++Stretching!
++Um, maybe not today, but I need to start writing, etc. on the paper. I need to get this knocked out of the way. This is ridiculous...
Btw, I got like, way in the MORNING east coast time so I think I have adjusted! Productivity ahead, woo! Also, might go to yoga tomorrow morning. Nothing like a morning appointment to get one up.
++FINISHED Ballet analysis
++Still need to run
++Do Fulbrightz paperwork stuff...
++Stretching!
++Um, maybe not today, but I need to start writing, etc. on the paper. I need to get this knocked out of the way. This is ridiculous...
Btw, I got like, way in the MORNING east coast time so I think I have adjusted! Productivity ahead, woo! Also, might go to yoga tomorrow morning. Nothing like a morning appointment to get one up.
advice for recent undergrads....based on ignorance.
http://www.newmusicbox.org/articles/graduate-school-a-backward-glance/
As someone who has been out in the workforce before, but is in music grad. school now, I have mixed feelings. How can one necessarily say that being in the workforce is better if you haven't had that experience? Or going for a degree in STEM? I have done both things, and have still chosen music grad. school (I was a double major in music & CS in undergrad). I also notice that in a lot of ways waiting so long and having these other experiences has worked to my detriment, since I do not have the connections or portfolio of those that have immediately continued after undergrad. Admittedly, I didn't major in composition anyways but had a concentration in voice, but it is fairly difficult to keep up a good portfolio while working as a software developer 40-hrs a week.
Also, I took that full-time job on the advice of nearly everyone in my social circle, and frankly, it was possibly the worst decision I ever made. I would never offer that advice to anyone.
First, while it is good to have a fallback plan in theory, a fallback plan that makes one miserable is only good in theory. STEM is a very different environment than being in an arts discipline. While I've seen many people crossover, I find the happy ones were pretty unhappy being musicians or simply a lot more excited about the technological/scientific aspects than the music.
Certainly, if the undergrads are not aware of the academic job market then they should be made aware. However, did they really think majoring in music composition was the way to a secure job position?
Then, they should be disabused of this notion. However....
The idea that one wants to relegate one's life passion into a hobby is something that not everybody finds palatable, no matter the cost. It works out for some people. Frankly, I've found having a dayjob exhausting and depressing. Grad school may be both at times (esp. when the environment is not supportive), but it is much less existentially why-I-am-fucking-alive depressing.
There is a view that the most important thing will boil down to having a secure job with which to support one's family and potential loved ones, and that security is of the utmost importance. Certainly, this should have some importance, but some people put more or less emphasis on it. They may come from a wealthier family and not need to provide as much of their own security or other pursuits may simply matter more (on a sliding scale).
To be honest, my instinct is to say that you should pursue your passion. That might not be music or career. Perhaps your family and loved ones are your true passion, and maybe a more sensible career is better.
However, to give the advice not to go to grad school full-stop (in general! not just music) is equally as foolish as going into grad school without your eyes open to the reality. Getting my master's in music at Dartmouth was possibly the best experience of my life. Regardless of how successful I am in my eventual career goals, I can already tell you it was one of the best decisions I have EVER made to both apply and go. I know this is the case for most (but not all) of graduates of this program.
All graduates programs are not the same, and some can be quite miserable and unsupportive. If you are not a good fit for the program, you will probably be miserable. There are lots of factors, not all of them completely predictable or easily found out. I am saying this as a person who has been in three fairly different programs. (I quit a CS grad school program, and am working on my music doctorate at another institution)
Nevertheless, it is a highly personal decision. And very few people go into the arts without a certain degree of passion, even if it is not enough to withstand the often fairly harsh conditions. So, just seeing this article ("don't go to grad school! even though I loved it! and I don't even know what having a dayjob is like!") felt insulting to me. You're not even speaking for yourself, dude.
As someone who has been out in the workforce before, but is in music grad. school now, I have mixed feelings. How can one necessarily say that being in the workforce is better if you haven't had that experience? Or going for a degree in STEM? I have done both things, and have still chosen music grad. school (I was a double major in music & CS in undergrad). I also notice that in a lot of ways waiting so long and having these other experiences has worked to my detriment, since I do not have the connections or portfolio of those that have immediately continued after undergrad. Admittedly, I didn't major in composition anyways but had a concentration in voice, but it is fairly difficult to keep up a good portfolio while working as a software developer 40-hrs a week.
Also, I took that full-time job on the advice of nearly everyone in my social circle, and frankly, it was possibly the worst decision I ever made. I would never offer that advice to anyone.
First, while it is good to have a fallback plan in theory, a fallback plan that makes one miserable is only good in theory. STEM is a very different environment than being in an arts discipline. While I've seen many people crossover, I find the happy ones were pretty unhappy being musicians or simply a lot more excited about the technological/scientific aspects than the music.
Certainly, if the undergrads are not aware of the academic job market then they should be made aware. However, did they really think majoring in music composition was the way to a secure job position?
Then, they should be disabused of this notion. However....
The idea that one wants to relegate one's life passion into a hobby is something that not everybody finds palatable, no matter the cost. It works out for some people. Frankly, I've found having a dayjob exhausting and depressing. Grad school may be both at times (esp. when the environment is not supportive), but it is much less existentially why-I-am-fucking-alive depressing.
There is a view that the most important thing will boil down to having a secure job with which to support one's family and potential loved ones, and that security is of the utmost importance. Certainly, this should have some importance, but some people put more or less emphasis on it. They may come from a wealthier family and not need to provide as much of their own security or other pursuits may simply matter more (on a sliding scale).
To be honest, my instinct is to say that you should pursue your passion. That might not be music or career. Perhaps your family and loved ones are your true passion, and maybe a more sensible career is better.
However, to give the advice not to go to grad school full-stop (in general! not just music) is equally as foolish as going into grad school without your eyes open to the reality. Getting my master's in music at Dartmouth was possibly the best experience of my life. Regardless of how successful I am in my eventual career goals, I can already tell you it was one of the best decisions I have EVER made to both apply and go. I know this is the case for most (but not all) of graduates of this program.
All graduates programs are not the same, and some can be quite miserable and unsupportive. If you are not a good fit for the program, you will probably be miserable. There are lots of factors, not all of them completely predictable or easily found out. I am saying this as a person who has been in three fairly different programs. (I quit a CS grad school program, and am working on my music doctorate at another institution)
Nevertheless, it is a highly personal decision. And very few people go into the arts without a certain degree of passion, even if it is not enough to withstand the often fairly harsh conditions. So, just seeing this article ("don't go to grad school! even though I loved it! and I don't even know what having a dayjob is like!") felt insulting to me. You're not even speaking for yourself, dude.
Friday, July 19, 2013
link blast, to-do despair
I have already run. Wooooooo. I also got up before noon, which is before 9am MY time. So, it is on.
I need to do more video analysis -- finish up the ballet and do another Variations V version -- well the Cage/Cunningham one. Then, another Variations V version. Then, THEN this paper-writing is gonna take off like a bat out of hell. Something like that.
I am also working on doing the splits. Like with your legs, not banana splits. I spent 2 Burn Notice episodes on this task last night. Or vaguely -- I spent that much time stretching.
Links:
I saw the Daily Show, and Sarah Vowell came on talking about David Rakoff's new book. Subsequently, I listened to "This American Life"'s tribute to him:
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/472/our-friend-david?act=0
I LOVED his bit about "Rent". Spoiler-- it is about how they keep on talking about artistic things but never do them, and why can't they go and pay their damn rent!
Random thought: Back when I was in high school, and early college I kinda thought of myself as this person who was really centered in the mind, and who didn't really like sports, etc... Well, I am not that into sports, but actually I have turned into a very active person. One day I am going to write a list of things that I do/am that would surprise 20-yr-old me. I think mostly she wouldn't be disappointed, although the not pursuing the rock star thing anymore would make her furious.
The largest virus ever found!
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/18/science/changing-view-on-viruses-not-so-small-after-all.html
Listened to Sarah Vowell's story of her gun-loving father:
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/81/guns
Got lost going to two coffeeshops in Charlotte, ended up in a Panera Bread. The Starbucks, which I chose as a desperate -- surely this will be open and actually a coffeeshop -- was in the TARGET which I didn't find until talking to a Panera Bread employee about it. Well, I am better off here.
I'll be honest, I am really struggling with getting anything done right now. After 6+ hours of wakefulness I have only achieved 47 minutes of running, getting ready for the day, and finally finding a location to work. Well, also I have prepared and eaten 2 meals, read the news, and listened to various npr programs. It is rather pathetic.
PS. I really feel, now that I do not have access to it, that I would be playing accordion for hours or SOMETHING. I supposed I can still work on adv. rhythm stuff, since my metronome is my phone, and I've been good about keeping it with me.
PS. I really feel, now that I do not have access to it, that I would be playing accordion for hours or SOMETHING. I supposed I can still work on adv. rhythm stuff, since my metronome is my phone, and I've been good about keeping it with me.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Things that impede productivity.
++Youtubes of dogs. The Internet loves cats, and cats are ok, often cute, but I am an intense dog lover. I just spent I don't know how long watching long lost dogs getting reunited owners. What is wrong with me? But one day, when I am very responsible and not moving around so much, I will get at least two dogs of my own. And we will run together through the woods or wood-like park area!
Dogs that sing!!! OMG, is it sad that I am so musically inspired by this???
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bt6-gygNcaw
++Deciding to start running/exercising before getting things done. Then my running becomes a prerequisite for getting things done. Other forms of this, like cleaning before work. Etc.
++Not knowing exactly where to go next or doubting the next move I've chosen on a project. This is the worst. It is a terrible fear of commitment that does not help at all.
++Not drinking coffee in the morning. Sadly, although I am not so addicted (at the MOMENT) that experience direct cravings after skipping a day, non-coffee days are WAAAAY less productive for me.
++Composing long political diatribes in my head. Thinking about saving the world in general. Anyways, I'll think -- the problem is not about electing the right PEOPLE we need to change the SYSTEM. But how do we change the system? Then this becomes complicated. And then I'll start thinking about the epistemological questions about the things I am thinking about. But I often think that there should be more of a national dialog about finding solutions to poverty and hunger. Like, why isn't this a top priority? I mean, actually, there are circumstances why this is so, but no good reasons.
++General Internet mayhem....
So -- I need to:
run
video analysis
emailz some pplz
ldjlakjfjjjalkdjfalkjf
By the way, had first personal trainer session on Monday. Was very sore the next two days. Even if scientifically inaccurate, I am going to tell myself that the soreness is a sign that I built muscles. See? Dubious facts one repeats to one's self can be very motivating/helpful. I think there was a Radiolab on that.
Relatedly, the belief that IQ is mutable / performance can be altered by hard work (rather than inborn skill) leads to better performance and more success. Therefore, my beliefs about the effect of hard work are practical and correlated with success, and possibly contribute to success. The whole process of believing something for personal gain becomes disturbing, though, in some ways. Does it? Well, I won't digress so this blog post becomes another thingy that makes me procrastinate. (Although, my beliefs in IQ are not merely because of the gains, but a nice perk.)
PS.
Listened to this interview this morning.
http://www.npr.org/2013/07/15/198040928/christ-in-context-zealot-explores-the-life-of-jesus
Dogs that sing!!! OMG, is it sad that I am so musically inspired by this???
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bt6-gygNcaw
++Deciding to start running/exercising before getting things done. Then my running becomes a prerequisite for getting things done. Other forms of this, like cleaning before work. Etc.
++Not knowing exactly where to go next or doubting the next move I've chosen on a project. This is the worst. It is a terrible fear of commitment that does not help at all.
++Not drinking coffee in the morning. Sadly, although I am not so addicted (at the MOMENT) that experience direct cravings after skipping a day, non-coffee days are WAAAAY less productive for me.
++Composing long political diatribes in my head. Thinking about saving the world in general. Anyways, I'll think -- the problem is not about electing the right PEOPLE we need to change the SYSTEM. But how do we change the system? Then this becomes complicated. And then I'll start thinking about the epistemological questions about the things I am thinking about. But I often think that there should be more of a national dialog about finding solutions to poverty and hunger. Like, why isn't this a top priority? I mean, actually, there are circumstances why this is so, but no good reasons.
++General Internet mayhem....
So -- I need to:
run
video analysis
emailz some pplz
ldjlakjfjjjalkdjfalkjf
By the way, had first personal trainer session on Monday. Was very sore the next two days. Even if scientifically inaccurate, I am going to tell myself that the soreness is a sign that I built muscles. See? Dubious facts one repeats to one's self can be very motivating/helpful. I think there was a Radiolab on that.
Relatedly, the belief that IQ is mutable / performance can be altered by hard work (rather than inborn skill) leads to better performance and more success. Therefore, my beliefs about the effect of hard work are practical and correlated with success, and possibly contribute to success. The whole process of believing something for personal gain becomes disturbing, though, in some ways. Does it? Well, I won't digress so this blog post becomes another thingy that makes me procrastinate. (Although, my beliefs in IQ are not merely because of the gains, but a nice perk.)
PS.
Listened to this interview this morning.
http://www.npr.org/2013/07/15/198040928/christ-in-context-zealot-explores-the-life-of-jesus
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh
Ok, break in productivity.
This shit drives me up a wall:
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/07/princeton-mom-sold-a-self-help-book.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/03/princeton-mom-to-all-students-find-a-husband.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/03/qa-princeton-mom-wishes-she-married-classmate.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/04/forget-sexism-princeton-mom-is-a-raging-elitist.html
Basically another article about women should concentrate on marriage and kids and it is SO SAD that we are throwing this in a garbage can for career, etc.
Ok, I call bullshit.
Almost all happiness or whatever studies show that children cause a drop in happiness, and women who marry later with more education are less likely to be divorced. They are also much more likely to be wealthy.
Now, does this mean that women who want to marry earlier and want to have kids shouldn't??! NO!! I mean, I'd think about it if you're REALLY young, but even so, its your life. You know about it, and your life is different from statistics. My parents got married when they were 21 and they are very happy now still, so I mean, who knows?
Your social connections are the main determinant of happiness as well as your financial situation. But that's still not all. Further, should you chase 'happiness'? Maybe, maybe not. I personally think happiness is overrated as a goal. I want to be a musician -- I want to create new things with it. This path is not maximized for happiness.
And ya, I'd think more seriously about children if it didn't mean a really serious blow against my career goals. But it does. And I'd definitely make some compromises for a life partner, but not in order to bring in new life into the world.
Plus, life partners are usually somewhat self-sufficient. And its one thing to enter into a commitment where someone could possibly very very MAYBE have a brain injury, etc. that renders them incapacitated and needing to be cared for. It is another to be entering into a situation where the person you are in a relationship with DEFINITELY won't be self-sufficient for 18+ years. Plus, the anxiety. OMFG, the anxiety. My sister was in a coma for 3+ weeks after a car accident, and that was so fucking scary. Plus, I DID feel responsible for her (lots of reasons for this). And its not like you can control what children do -- eventually they WILL put themselves in dangerous situations. Horrible things happen to people ALL the time. It is a lot of stress to feel responsible for a person that you don't really have control over. I mean, when they are younger you will have more control, but that doesn't last so long. And you have to allow them SOME freedom.
And the reality is that there is not societal support for having children -- it is an expectation that someone (usually the woman) takes a shit ton of time off work... etc. And power to women that are willing to make that sacrifice but I can't imagine taking that much time away from my music career. Hell, I've decided to wait to have a DOG.
Anyways, I'm 33, and I haven't found it that hard to date people, ever. It is definitely easier than dating in college bc I have so much more social skills, etc. And, ya, someday I'd like to get married, but I'm not gonna put a deadline on it or anything. And I'm not waiting the perfect guy to settle down or anything. In fact, I've thought I've found the 'perfect guy' 3-4 times to be honest. One time I was DEFINITELY 100% WRONG ... SO glad dodged that bullet, etc (ironically the one time I was actually engaged). but the others, I dunno it is very specific why they didn't work out. And hey, I'm not single now, so who knows? I can't put a lot weight on everything, although I am more willing to compromise in terms of career things than when I was 25, etc.
Being a spinster with a ton of dogs doesn't sound so bad to me. Just as long as I have a good friends and I don't have any regrets, esp. about music.
So FUCK all these articles about how I should be desperate about finding a man. (Or, I guess trying to marry the one I have, etc.) I can't believe how fucking condescending they are.
Oh, ya, and that women's elitist bullshit is fucking elitist, too. LOL. (from the article)
This shit drives me up a wall:
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/07/princeton-mom-sold-a-self-help-book.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/03/princeton-mom-to-all-students-find-a-husband.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/03/qa-princeton-mom-wishes-she-married-classmate.html
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/04/forget-sexism-princeton-mom-is-a-raging-elitist.html
Basically another article about women should concentrate on marriage and kids and it is SO SAD that we are throwing this in a garbage can for career, etc.
Ok, I call bullshit.
Almost all happiness or whatever studies show that children cause a drop in happiness, and women who marry later with more education are less likely to be divorced. They are also much more likely to be wealthy.
Now, does this mean that women who want to marry earlier and want to have kids shouldn't??! NO!! I mean, I'd think about it if you're REALLY young, but even so, its your life. You know about it, and your life is different from statistics. My parents got married when they were 21 and they are very happy now still, so I mean, who knows?
Your social connections are the main determinant of happiness as well as your financial situation. But that's still not all. Further, should you chase 'happiness'? Maybe, maybe not. I personally think happiness is overrated as a goal. I want to be a musician -- I want to create new things with it. This path is not maximized for happiness.
And ya, I'd think more seriously about children if it didn't mean a really serious blow against my career goals. But it does. And I'd definitely make some compromises for a life partner, but not in order to bring in new life into the world.
Plus, life partners are usually somewhat self-sufficient. And its one thing to enter into a commitment where someone could possibly very very MAYBE have a brain injury, etc. that renders them incapacitated and needing to be cared for. It is another to be entering into a situation where the person you are in a relationship with DEFINITELY won't be self-sufficient for 18+ years. Plus, the anxiety. OMFG, the anxiety. My sister was in a coma for 3+ weeks after a car accident, and that was so fucking scary. Plus, I DID feel responsible for her (lots of reasons for this). And its not like you can control what children do -- eventually they WILL put themselves in dangerous situations. Horrible things happen to people ALL the time. It is a lot of stress to feel responsible for a person that you don't really have control over. I mean, when they are younger you will have more control, but that doesn't last so long. And you have to allow them SOME freedom.
And the reality is that there is not societal support for having children -- it is an expectation that someone (usually the woman) takes a shit ton of time off work... etc. And power to women that are willing to make that sacrifice but I can't imagine taking that much time away from my music career. Hell, I've decided to wait to have a DOG.
Anyways, I'm 33, and I haven't found it that hard to date people, ever. It is definitely easier than dating in college bc I have so much more social skills, etc. And, ya, someday I'd like to get married, but I'm not gonna put a deadline on it or anything. And I'm not waiting the perfect guy to settle down or anything. In fact, I've thought I've found the 'perfect guy' 3-4 times to be honest. One time I was DEFINITELY 100% WRONG ... SO glad dodged that bullet, etc (ironically the one time I was actually engaged). but the others, I dunno it is very specific why they didn't work out. And hey, I'm not single now, so who knows? I can't put a lot weight on everything, although I am more willing to compromise in terms of career things than when I was 25, etc.
Being a spinster with a ton of dogs doesn't sound so bad to me. Just as long as I have a good friends and I don't have any regrets, esp. about music.
So FUCK all these articles about how I should be desperate about finding a man. (Or, I guess trying to marry the one I have, etc.) I can't believe how fucking condescending they are.
Oh, ya, and that women's elitist bullshit is fucking elitist, too. LOL. (from the article)
I used to get so much done...
Its true... I used to work an ungodly amount every day.... just like, two short months ago. I was insanely productive. And now.... well, I am happy to get a decent work-out in and two or three hours of video analysis / paper work.. plus my Spanish when I have homework or class.
I suppose this is why I am blogging now -- to-do-ing. It is hard to get things done without structure. But I think I am also recovering from working too much the past school year. I need to learn to say NO to things I don't need to do or want to do.
But in the moment, I need to get going.
++video analysis
Yupz.
++15 min of accordion / dino a day
See, I think an hour is something that is hard to commit to doing initially. I will work my way up until I am a fully functional / productive person again... I am ashamed to say I have not touched these since I made my initial goal last weekend D:
++Spanish homework
++workout - I was thinking of going extreme here -- like 2 hours of cardio or something, but we'll see.
++drink an insane amt of green tea and water
I had a shit ton of salt the other day at a party, and I am still retaining water, so I am trying to flush that shiz out. I also made / drank my first green smoothie today which was ok. It was:
2 c. of kale and spinach, chopped (well torn)
3/4 c. of pineapple
1/2 of an apple
1/2 c. of frozen raspberries
A bit of lime juice
1/2 c. of of my iced green tea (this one has quite a bit of ginger)
It was EXTREMELY filling. It is about 150 calories. You'd need some kind of protein powder to make it a meal.
Finally got in touch with a personal trainer... should be interesting.
I also want to start getting up earlier. I have kept it to not insane levels of sleeping in / staying up, but I would like to be ready for East Coast time in a week. Plus, it is so much easier to get work done during a normal schedule.
I want to make these:
http://www.refinery29.com/alcoholic-popsicles?page=2
I also made a fucking dinosaur, yo. I need to like submit that shiz all over. Le sighz. Also, need to document my little blown away installation.
I suppose this is why I am blogging now -- to-do-ing. It is hard to get things done without structure. But I think I am also recovering from working too much the past school year. I need to learn to say NO to things I don't need to do or want to do.
But in the moment, I need to get going.
++video analysis
Yupz.
++15 min of accordion / dino a day
See, I think an hour is something that is hard to commit to doing initially. I will work my way up until I am a fully functional / productive person again... I am ashamed to say I have not touched these since I made my initial goal last weekend D:
++Spanish homework
++workout - I was thinking of going extreme here -- like 2 hours of cardio or something, but we'll see.
++drink an insane amt of green tea and water
I had a shit ton of salt the other day at a party, and I am still retaining water, so I am trying to flush that shiz out. I also made / drank my first green smoothie today which was ok. It was:
2 c. of kale and spinach, chopped (well torn)
3/4 c. of pineapple
1/2 of an apple
1/2 c. of frozen raspberries
A bit of lime juice
1/2 c. of of my iced green tea (this one has quite a bit of ginger)
It was EXTREMELY filling. It is about 150 calories. You'd need some kind of protein powder to make it a meal.
Finally got in touch with a personal trainer... should be interesting.
I also want to start getting up earlier. I have kept it to not insane levels of sleeping in / staying up, but I would like to be ready for East Coast time in a week. Plus, it is so much easier to get work done during a normal schedule.
I want to make these:
http://www.refinery29.com/alcoholic-popsicles?page=2
I also made a fucking dinosaur, yo. I need to like submit that shiz all over. Le sighz. Also, need to document my little blown away installation.
Saturday, July 6, 2013
belated thoughts about fat acceptance
So, I forgot to publish this when I wrote it... I summarized these points in another post but oh well.
I have been reading about fat acceptance, mainly because this article compared 'Fat Liberation' to the LGBT movement. I was a bit appalled at that article, mostly because of the attempt to draw very direct parallels between being fat and being gay.
Now, I can see some similarities: the idea of "choice" and the use of 'health' as a motivating factor of discrimination. Also, I do agree that overweight people are unfairly discriminated against, and a lot of it in very cruel, unfair ways.
However, she makes this statement: "Yes, fat people can get married, but many thin people would not consider dating, let alone loving and marrying, someone who is fat." To me, this is undercutting to her argument, and belittling to the struggles of people who were legally and systematically discriminated against in this particular arena.
Dating and love will always, always be unfair in this way, and that goes for attributes beyond just weight. If like in earlier ages, plump women were highly preferred, it would be the thin ones making this complaint. Also, substitute 'HUGE noses' for 'fat' and you can maybe see more easily where I am going.
Also, although the health dangers of being obese and overweight seem to be exaggerated by the medical community, there is a connection between weight and many diseases. Obesity should probably NOT be considered a disease by the AMA but it shouldn't be completely discounted as a risk factor. Being underweight also carries with it many health dangers.
Secondly, absent an actual disorder (and obviously there are many people with these) to claim that the lifestyle of overweight people does not any way contribute to this condition does not seem plausible. The problem is, once people reach obesity, it does seem like it is very hard to lose the weight. Losing weight is hard for me, as a thin person (I know bc I am doing it right now), and the problem is that it is not, by in large, easier for people heavier than me.
But I only have 5-10 pounds I'd prefer, if I could, to lose... it must be infinitely harder to lose more than that. Plus, I've been gaining and losing the same 15 or less pounds all my adult life. Not in a depressing way -- I've found when I go above a ccrtain set point, its because my normal habits have changed and it comes off easily once I've re-adjusted. But anyways, having to lose more than 10 pounds -- and permanently --seems daunting. I'd think you'd really have to devote a lot of your life to that. It'd be similar to being a pro-athlete.
So, both to call being fat a 'choice' AND 'not a choice' seems to the wrong way of looking at it. That sounds like the mushy middle, but oh well. UNLESS, in the instance of a disorder or disease, then obviously it is totally not a choice!!
And, to tell you the truth, I was FAR more appalled at the horrible fat-shaming comments to this article than the article's actual comparison to the LGBT movement. Being anonymous really gives people free reign to be nasty.
Also, judging someone based on their weight is an INCORRECT way of assessing people anyways. It is not just nasty: it leads to false conclusions.
I have been reading about fat acceptance, mainly because this article compared 'Fat Liberation' to the LGBT movement. I was a bit appalled at that article, mostly because of the attempt to draw very direct parallels between being fat and being gay.
Now, I can see some similarities: the idea of "choice" and the use of 'health' as a motivating factor of discrimination. Also, I do agree that overweight people are unfairly discriminated against, and a lot of it in very cruel, unfair ways.
However, she makes this statement: "Yes, fat people can get married, but many thin people would not consider dating, let alone loving and marrying, someone who is fat." To me, this is undercutting to her argument, and belittling to the struggles of people who were legally and systematically discriminated against in this particular arena.
Dating and love will always, always be unfair in this way, and that goes for attributes beyond just weight. If like in earlier ages, plump women were highly preferred, it would be the thin ones making this complaint. Also, substitute 'HUGE noses' for 'fat' and you can maybe see more easily where I am going.
Also, although the health dangers of being obese and overweight seem to be exaggerated by the medical community, there is a connection between weight and many diseases. Obesity should probably NOT be considered a disease by the AMA but it shouldn't be completely discounted as a risk factor. Being underweight also carries with it many health dangers.
Secondly, absent an actual disorder (and obviously there are many people with these) to claim that the lifestyle of overweight people does not any way contribute to this condition does not seem plausible. The problem is, once people reach obesity, it does seem like it is very hard to lose the weight. Losing weight is hard for me, as a thin person (I know bc I am doing it right now), and the problem is that it is not, by in large, easier for people heavier than me.
But I only have 5-10 pounds I'd prefer, if I could, to lose... it must be infinitely harder to lose more than that. Plus, I've been gaining and losing the same 15 or less pounds all my adult life. Not in a depressing way -- I've found when I go above a ccrtain set point, its because my normal habits have changed and it comes off easily once I've re-adjusted. But anyways, having to lose more than 10 pounds -- and permanently --seems daunting. I'd think you'd really have to devote a lot of your life to that. It'd be similar to being a pro-athlete.
So, both to call being fat a 'choice' AND 'not a choice' seems to the wrong way of looking at it. That sounds like the mushy middle, but oh well. UNLESS, in the instance of a disorder or disease, then obviously it is totally not a choice!!
And, to tell you the truth, I was FAR more appalled at the horrible fat-shaming comments to this article than the article's actual comparison to the LGBT movement. Being anonymous really gives people free reign to be nasty.
Also, judging someone based on their weight is an INCORRECT way of assessing people anyways. It is not just nasty: it leads to false conclusions.
saturday, mo' workin' out, mo' workz
So, I've been thinking how much easier it is to diet and workout compared to make time for working on music. I guess I got really burnt-out last semester. Plus, in terms of accordion, it like, let's be HONEST -- fucking sucks when you return to your instrument after a couple months hiatus. Plus, picking up the instrument inches me into a mini-existential crisis: its been THIS LONG since I played?? Who am I?! And then your hands are all like blah blah I'm all over the place you are NOT one with the music, girl.
But.
Ahem.
I have decided that I will do at least:
1 hr. of accordion
1 hr. of dinosaur-playing
a day. and not like, serious practicing. But, at least, I will be on it. Then, after fooling around and getting my groove back, I will actually start real practicing.
I also want to start practicing the adv. rhythm stuff. Maybe I will do that on my instruments, instead of takedimis.
I will have to look at renting an accordion in Roanoke.
During the school year, I will reduce it to 1/2 hr. Maybe every other day, but I will try to keep up.
So, today I will try and do those things as well as:
++Finish video analysis on the first video. OMFG, so close to this.
++Work out in the gym!
Umm, well it is a weekend day so I think that is enough.
One thing I have been working on in my diet is reducing sodium. I am not a chocoholic nor am I into sweets or anything. But, BOY do I love salty, crunchy things. Boy, do I love salt. While I've mostly stayed away from chips, etc -- usually not a normal part of my diet so that's not hard. But I lovesz the salt. Trying to curb it!
I am also drinking a lot of green tea. I mean, burns almost 100 cal a day if you drink at least 4 cups a day. Which isn't TOOO bad. Esp. since the iced version subs for water pretty well.
But.
Ahem.
I have decided that I will do at least:
1 hr. of accordion
1 hr. of dinosaur-playing
a day. and not like, serious practicing. But, at least, I will be on it. Then, after fooling around and getting my groove back, I will actually start real practicing.
I also want to start practicing the adv. rhythm stuff. Maybe I will do that on my instruments, instead of takedimis.
I will have to look at renting an accordion in Roanoke.
During the school year, I will reduce it to 1/2 hr. Maybe every other day, but I will try to keep up.
So, today I will try and do those things as well as:
++Finish video analysis on the first video. OMFG, so close to this.
++Work out in the gym!
Umm, well it is a weekend day so I think that is enough.
One thing I have been working on in my diet is reducing sodium. I am not a chocoholic nor am I into sweets or anything. But, BOY do I love salty, crunchy things. Boy, do I love salt. While I've mostly stayed away from chips, etc -- usually not a normal part of my diet so that's not hard. But I lovesz the salt. Trying to curb it!
I am also drinking a lot of green tea. I mean, burns almost 100 cal a day if you drink at least 4 cups a day. Which isn't TOOO bad. Esp. since the iced version subs for water pretty well.
Friday, July 5, 2013
things for Friday TODAY
++workout -- some weight-training, some cardio
I have been encouraged that although I have not lost that much weight, I have lost at least 1/2" off my waist... plus, obv. I should know this, but being relatively low in BMI (not underweight, but low-ish) it takes longer for me to lose weight, etc.
++wake-up at 10a tomorrow
Must start getting into Eastern time somehow so that I can spend time with my family. We may go to a museum in order to motivate. Or working out.
++more video analysis
I have been analyzing 9 points on every other frame of video by hand. This is madness, and I have already spent over 10 hrs on this task, for 87s of video. I am going to try sampling every 4 frames instead.
Had a good 4th of July with our neighbors. Played beer pong for the 1st time again in years! I think the last time was in Jersey City after a poetry slam. Man! I am old person living like I am 23 all the time. I become worried that I am somehow horribly immature, sometimes. Though, went to a tango party last week where most were older than me, so maybe I am just open-minded. But being a grad student PLUS in the arts keeps you in this oddly young place all the timez, no matter the age.
++jesus I need to start on music shiz. start iiiiiiittttttttt. at the same time, this damn em paper must take priority.
I became interested in the Fat Acceptance movement.. I have some mixed feelings about some of this.
++health concerns seem to be underestimated in this community -- obesity is at least correlated strongly with diabetes, breast cancer, other diseasess
++obesity should not be designated a disease... it is a risk factor not a disease, itself.
++related: medical community does seem to overemphasize the health dangers of obesity(as part of stigmatizing)
++being fat is not a choice, BUT I do NOT believe that that it is unrelated to lifestyle unless the symptom/result of a disease/disorder (eg, thyroid disorder)
++it is much easier to become obese than to lose weight... our bodies want to hold on to that weight after a while. This doesn't necessarily mean there is a predetermined *genetic* set-point, irrespective of lifestyle, etc. Indeed, data points to this being false -- the rapid rise of overweight people.
++obese people are horribly discriminated against and this is *wrong*. Look, shaming doesn't help people lose weight and it is frankly, rude and disgusting to treat people badly because of their weight.
I have been encouraged that although I have not lost that much weight, I have lost at least 1/2" off my waist... plus, obv. I should know this, but being relatively low in BMI (not underweight, but low-ish) it takes longer for me to lose weight, etc.
++wake-up at 10a tomorrow
Must start getting into Eastern time somehow so that I can spend time with my family. We may go to a museum in order to motivate. Or working out.
++more video analysis
I have been analyzing 9 points on every other frame of video by hand. This is madness, and I have already spent over 10 hrs on this task, for 87s of video. I am going to try sampling every 4 frames instead.
Had a good 4th of July with our neighbors. Played beer pong for the 1st time again in years! I think the last time was in Jersey City after a poetry slam. Man! I am old person living like I am 23 all the time. I become worried that I am somehow horribly immature, sometimes. Though, went to a tango party last week where most were older than me, so maybe I am just open-minded. But being a grad student PLUS in the arts keeps you in this oddly young place all the timez, no matter the age.
++jesus I need to start on music shiz. start iiiiiiittttttttt. at the same time, this damn em paper must take priority.
I became interested in the Fat Acceptance movement.. I have some mixed feelings about some of this.
++health concerns seem to be underestimated in this community -- obesity is at least correlated strongly with diabetes, breast cancer, other diseasess
++obesity should not be designated a disease... it is a risk factor not a disease, itself.
++related: medical community does seem to overemphasize the health dangers of obesity(as part of stigmatizing)
++being fat is not a choice, BUT I do NOT believe that that it is unrelated to lifestyle unless the symptom/result of a disease/disorder (eg, thyroid disorder)
++it is much easier to become obese than to lose weight... our bodies want to hold on to that weight after a while. This doesn't necessarily mean there is a predetermined *genetic* set-point, irrespective of lifestyle, etc. Indeed, data points to this being false -- the rapid rise of overweight people.
++obese people are horribly discriminated against and this is *wrong*. Look, shaming doesn't help people lose weight and it is frankly, rude and disgusting to treat people badly because of their weight.
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